Tyler and myself have been together for 6 (feels like 17) years. At the end of this year we will have attended 28 weddings together (I know, he’s a real social butterfly with too many friends) and from sitting in attendance at all those weddings, this is what I’ve learned:
Getting married is one of the bravest choices we can make as humans because it involves choosing to love something that death can touch.
So how does one get dressed (or armor themselves) for one of the bravest moments of their life?
Well, our contributing writer, Maura Walters, asked four duos (including our very own Caitlin!) who all got married at City Hall, what kind of planning and coordination went into their outfits for the big day.
In terms of pomp and circumstance, these weddings were the opposite of what we all saw this past weekend in England, but the coolest thing about weddings is that no mater the size or cost of celebration, in the end it’s just two people pledging their love and lives to another. That takes guts. And a whole lot of love.
Caitlin and Kris, married November 3rd, 2017
Kris: We were getting married at city hall so we wanted to do something a little unique because we were also having a formal dinner where we wore the traditional attire — I wore a tux. We wanted to do something funky, so we worked on our outfits together. We were both drawn towards Gucci because we loved the recent collections so we focused on Gucci and when we saw the actual suit it definitely spoke to me and it spoke to Caitlin as well.
Caitlin: My look was inspired by Kris’s! He bought his suit first — which has a lot of flair and color to it — and I wanted to complement his. It became obvious that the best way to match Gucci is with…more Gucci! So that’s where we started. I chose the red dress because it felt special and I never saw myself as a traditional “white wedding” bride — also — you get more than one wear out of a piece like that, which is important to me.
Everything else followed. The bag became my “something blue,” an oversized clutch in python — and, surprise!, also Gucci (I think it’s the hero piece of the look). It’s embellished with these beautiful hand-woven birds, and I’ve worn it every weekend since. The earrings were oversized bees with delicate beading, so the birds and the bees were both in attendance. The finishing touch was a pair of green velvet heels that subtly rounded out the outfit.
At first Kris wasn’t sure about his suit choice but as he added accessories, and I pulled my outfit together, I don’t think we could imagine getting married in anything else… it was like completing a fun fashion puzzle with a million little pieces. One of the things I first noticed about Kris (and fell in love with!) was his appreciation for fashion, men’s and women’s. He has a very distinctive style — from suiting to weekend wear — which he’s perfected over the years and his City Hall look brought all the best parts of his fashion personality together: A little formal, a little whimsy, some play on color, and a lot of thought.
Kris: It’s so neat when you go into City Hall to get married because every walk of life is coming together to get married. People are there to express love for their friends and family who are getting married. It’s so interesting to see how everyone gets dressed up for that event in their lives, so we wanted to stand out and look a little unique but we also wanted our outfits to work with each other.
Caitlin: What we wore is indicative of our relationship: We push each other to evolve, to test boundaries, to be better, and to trust ourselves (and each other).
Amanda and Hans, married January 12th, 2018
Amanda: We’re not super traditional, so getting married in a black dress felt right. I added the white jacket at the last minute. The white fur jacket wasn’t the most practical–it was raining that day so fur maybe wasn’t the best choice. But getting married at city hall felt very practical, so I figured I could dial up the drama with my outfit!
Hans: I wore a blazer that I typically wear on holiday dates in the winter so it’s sort of nostalgic for me. I have a picture of us when we first moved to New York where I’m wearing it and we bought tickets for the ballet at the wrong time and had to buy another set.
Amanda: That was probably my fault…
Hans: The coat is pretty special as my grandpa had it made in the 1950s. It’s super nice, vintage cashmere and way too big for me but I can’t bring myself to get it tailored — I think I’ll just have to grow into it.
Amanda: The earrings were a gift from my mom – it was a nod to my Sri Lankan heritage, where traditionally weddings are a big life moment with everyone you know. We’re still planning to have a celebration for all of our family and friends but we wanted the city hall ceremony to be just for us.
Hans: Reflecting on what we wore it and how we look it reminds me of our relationship. We manage to find the fun in everything.
Amanda: We were together for 10 year before getting married, so we’ve witnessed and helped each other grow up from dumb kids to functioning adults (most of the time). I think in our outfits and our marriage, we try to find a balance of fun with practical.
Bogdana and Jason, married October 21st, 2017
Bogdana: I wore a 1950s inspired dress whose color I would describe as pistachio cream. It’s very simple, and fit my curves just right. I guess that’s what was so magical about that Old Hollywood era of fashion.
We didn’t have a lot of time to plan our wedding, so we had to make our styling decisions pretty fast, and on a budget. I couldn’t find anything online that wouldn’t be just a super cheap version of the standard wedding dress, so I scoured what felt like a million boutiques in NYC. I eventually found my dress at the last store I went to. They had to dig it out of the stock room for me! The shoes I already had: An old pair of blue suede pumps.
Jason: It was really important to me that my outfit be custom made. The bespoke sport coat was handcrafted in Burgundy, France, in a color that matched the bride’s eyes. Just kidding! It was literally all from J. Crew.
The starting point was Bogdana’s dress. It’s not that we were trying to be matchy-matchy, but we wanted our outfits to complement each other. Her shoes were navy blue, and since 90 percent of my wardrobe is navy blue, it felt perfect. Although your trendier readers may call me basic, I do think that J. Crew does a really good job of creating men’s clothing that’s the right balance of fashionable and practical. Like you’re putting in effort but not not trying too hard.
Bogdana: The most special element to my outfit was the flower wreath I wore in my hair. My mother made it for me, as flower wreaths are a staple of the traditional Ukrainian costume. It wouldn’t stay on my head properly, so I had to wear it for the photos only. But I still tried to keep it there, just like in those exercises with a book in etiquette lessons. My mom put together every flower herself, cutting out pieces of fabric, and sewing and dyeing them. Mom and Dad couldn’t make it to our wedding, so she wanted to give me something that would bring us all together.
Jason: I didn’t wear a tie because I grew up in Florida and my memories of ties are that they are knots for making you sweat. I did get a new pair of boots for the wedding. I had a similar pair of boots that were comfortable and had a nice worn-in look, but new shiny boots with a cap toe seemed more wedding appropriate. I wore socks with bright pink flamingos because, Florida. Since I love my wife so much, I decided I’d make a really big effort and keep my shirt tucked in. I plan to remind her regularly of my sacrifice. I used a flower from Bogdana’s bouquet as my boutonnière.
Bogdana: To me, modest wedding attire always made sense. I was never big on fairy tale love stories and princess outfits, so I guess my idea of this day was always more practical. Plus, that morning I had a portfolio review at the school I’d been applying to, after which I had to run straight to the City Hall. I had to make sure I was comfortable for both appointments!
Evi and Kyle, married January 21st, 2016
Evi: My dress is from Urban Outfitters! It was a last-minute pick. I tried so many dresses and didn’t feel comfortable with any of them. Let’s just say white isn’t my color. I needed to feel free, and outside of stereotypes. I was 24, and honestly getting married so young felt rebellious. I think the dress is a nod to that. I chose it because I thought it was elegant but also simple. I felt confident, stylish and also like I had found a bargain! I guess you could say it was not practical to wear sandals and a short dress in January, but I didn’t wanted the weather to ruin my style.
Kyle: I wore a black floral suit with purple shoes. It was very loud! I got everything at Macy’s. I chose the outfit because I thought it was cool—it wasn’t traditional or standard and it made sense for me cause that’s how I like to dress. I love prints and outstanding colors. It was super comfortable and warm, perfect for winter. Best of all, I felt like myself and not just another groom.
Evi: Kyle and I love 70’s style, and we wanted to show that off. I chose to carry gardenias, because they’re our favorite flower: Kyle’s mom always grew them in her garden n Florida, and my grandmother loved them: Every Saturday my grandfather would come home with a little bouquet for her. The fragrance is so strong and always reminds me of their love.